It is a High Tech World
by John Norberg, humor columnist s

I just bought an iPhone. They're incredible.

You can take photos and videos, read news, cruise the internet, watch movies and TV shows, listen to music, check stocks, calculate, do e-mail, text message, check the weather anywhere, find out where you are if you're lost, check the date and time, play games.

This thing does everything but wash the windows. You can even make telephone calls with this telephone.

If a man has GPS on his phone can his wife track where he's going? If so, I'm going to get caught at some ice cream places.

I remember when a telephone was something that hung from the wall and rang in the middle of your favorite TV show. Today telephones are multi-taskers and an essential part of life.

I love my iPhone, but it is a very high tech. And since I'm very low tech, I've been working hard to figure out all the features. I'm afraid by the time I figure it all out, the phone will be obsolete.

I'm actually using my cell phone to go on the Internet to find out how to use my cell phone. So essentially, my cell phone is showing me how to use my cell phone.

The world is moving a too fast for me.

It isn't only cell phones. Everything in our lives today is high tech. I have to call our grandkids to get the DVD player to work. Our oven, microwave and dishwasher have so many buttons, lights and functions that I don't go near them.

Every part of our lives is becoming computerized.

Someday when our sink backs up we're going to have to call technical support instead of a plumber.

Tech guy: "This sink is ruined. You spilled Coke on it, didn't you!"

Me: "It's just a sink!"

Tech guy: "It used to be just a sink. Now it's a highly sophisticated piece of technology and you've ruined it. From now, don't eat or drink around your sink."

Nine months ago we had to buy a new clothes washer. I've reached page 300 of the instruction manual, I still have a long way to go and I don't know how to use the thing.

My wife has to do all the laundry.

You know, when you think about it, there are some good things coming out of this new high technology.

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